My problem is that I have never had an orgasm. I am heterosexual, and have normal heterosexual instincts; I like men - a lot. I have been having sex since I was 19. Which means, I suppose, that I have been 'doing it' for half my life. Yet in all that time, I have never, ever climaxed.

In recent years, I have become so desperate about this that I have 'slept with' man after man after man - men at the university, men I met socially, and others I encountered on holiday. They all seem to find me attractive, but they have never been able to make me have an orgasm.

What do you think I should do, doctor? Is there any medication that would help me? Or should I just keep on trying till I find the right man?

I have an friend in the United States, and I confided in her about this. She told me that in the United States they have special 'workshops' for women like me. But she did not know much about it.

Please help me. I do not want to spend the rest of my life having endless 'one-night stands' in the hope that I will eventually find the right penis that would make me have an orgasm. I appreciate that maybe there just isn't one. So should I keep on trying with different men? Or should I consider this American idea? Is there any hope for me?

A. I am sorry to hear this. There are many women like you, who have passed their mid-30s and still haven't had an orgasm. Unfortunately, there is no medication that will make everything right.

Sadly, a lot of them do what you have done, and give their bodies to man after man, in the hope that one will have the 'right' penis that will make them climax.

But the fact is that this problem has nothing to do with the partner's male organ. No, the problem invariably lies in the woman's mind - because she has been unable to 'relax' and 'let go'.

An additional factor is that many women have simply never had enough attention paid to their clitorises. Intensive stimulation of the clitoris for a sufficient period of time will make almost any female have an orgasm, provided that she is in the right frame of mind.

But alas, in 'one-night stands' many men have no time to devote to the clitoris; they just want to 'get on' and climax.

I can assure you that there is hope for you. Only last month, I read about the results published by a woman therapist in Scandinavia, who treats women who have the same problem as you.

She reports that no less than 93 per cent of her patients succeed in reaching orgasm. And many of them are much older than you. One was 88!

Her methods are very similar to those of the American 'workshops' that you have heard about. Half a dozen women spend relaxed sessions together, talking about their problems and learning to lose their inhibitions about 'letting go'.

Eventually, the leader of the workshop shows them how to use vibrators on the clitoris - so as to produce their first orgasm. Then they learn to transfer this new skill to their bed with their partners.

Before you make up your mind about going to the United States and participating in these workshops, I suggest you look at a website which explains them. Try studying a very frank and honest one, which is: www.bettydodson.com

If you don't have the finances to go, then I suggest you buy a vibrator and find yourself a good counsellor who can help you to relax and to be more 'laid-back' about your body.

The one thing you should not do is continue on your present course of having sex with so many men. That is very bad for your self-esteem, and of course it could get you into all sorts of trouble healthwise. I wish you well.

A. This may be due to an infection. It is essential that you see a doctor this week, and have him check out your genitals. Do not delay.

A. Yes, HRT does increase the risk of getting a thrombosis (a clot).

However, the risk is not all that great - particularly if you are not a smoker and have no other 'risk factors' (like diabetes).

For these reasons, doctors are willing to prescribe HRT 'short-term' for most women to ease their menopause symptoms. But you should only take it for as long as it is needed.

A. Unfortunately, removing the entire prostate through a cut in the lower part of the belly does indeed lead to loss of ability to get an erection.

There is another 'milder' operation, in which the surgeon pushes a cutting instrument up inside the penis, and 'nibbles away' part of the prostate from inside. However, this 'op' may also make erection difficult.

On the other hand, relatively new 'anti-impotence' treatments can help a guy get an erection and have sex - even though he has taken a prostate operation. These treatments include the drugs Viagra, Cialis and Levitra, as well as procedures in which the guy injects a drug into the penis just before he has sex.

Also, it is possible to obtain an erection by inserting a 'pellet' of a special drug into the pipe that runs through the penis.

Before you go ahead with the operation, I think you should discuss everything with the surgeon or a member of his team.

A. It is a very common condition, in which areas of fibrosis (that is, thickening) and areas of cysts (fluid-filled swellings) develop in the breasts.

It is not - repeat, not - cancerous. It is thought to be caused from the 'ebb and flow' of female hormones.

Symptoms include 'lumpiness' and tenderness in the breasts, particularly before her monthly cycle.

Your girlfriend's doctor will prescribe medication - possibly including the 'pill'. Some authorities think that sufferers should avoid coffee and cut down on fats.

A. In nearly all cases, yes. In a small minority of women, the doctor may advise avoiding actual intercourse. But 'love play' is OK.