I am 38 and he is 10 years older than me. I love him very much. He has always been real healthy. And until recently, we had a great sex life together.

But in the last few weeks he has not been so well. It has been very obvious that sometimes he has been fretting about something. And he hasn't had much energy for sex, which is most unlike him.

Eventually, I asked him to sit down and tell me what was wrong. He told me that he had been having some kind of trouble with passing urine. In fact, I found out that, without telling me, he had gone to a doctor.

As far as I can make out, the doc examined his bottom and then told him he had 'prostate trouble'.

The doctor has fixed up for him to see a surgeon-specialist next month. My husband does not know if he will have to take an operation or not. I do not know what that prostate thing is, or what it does. But both of us think it must be something to do with sex.

A friend of mine told me that she stimulates her man's prostate, and that it has 'a real good effect on him'. But she did not tell me how she does that.

Could the fact that we have had a great deal of sex be the cause of the prostate trouble? What do you think, doctor? Could my husband have cancer?

A. Well, let me begin by explaining what the prostate gland is. I find that many members of the public know little about it.

All guys have a prostate. It is a little gland which is about the size of a small ackee. If you look at a man from the front, imagine that the prostate is located a few inches behind his pubic hair.

Unfortunately, the only way in which it can be FELT is by inserting a finger into the man's rectum. That is why the doc examined your husband's bottom.

Prostate function

What is the function of the prostate? Well, it is a sex gland. It produces quite a bit of a guy's sexual fluid, including some of the 'dewdrops' which often start appearing at the tip of the penis soon after the onset of love play.

Most unfortunately, the urinary pipe runs through the middle of the prostate gland. I say 'most unfortunately' because this means that if the prostate starts to become enlarged, that can interfere with the flow of urine - or even block it altogether.

And alas, the prostate gland DOES enlarge! In most guys, it will start getting a little bigger when they are in their 50s, and carry on doing so in their 60s. That is why so many 60-plus men have difficulties with passing urine.

Now, I think your husband is 48 - which is pretty young for having real bad prostate trouble. So let us hope that when he sees the surgeon-specialist he will be told that he doesn't have too much to fret about.

What about the possibility of cancer? Well, I am pleased to tell you 'benign' (that is, non-cancerous) enlargement of the prostate is much commoner than cancer of the prostate. So the odds are that this enlargement is NOT cancerous.

I do assure you that prostate enlargement is most certainly NOT caused from 'having a lot of sex'. And a couple of years ago scientists came up with the surprising finding that guys who had had a good deal of sex, and particularly masturbation, are LESS likely to get prostate cancer.

'Massaging' the prostate

Finally, you ask me about your friend's habit of stimulating her man's prostate during sex play. Yes, this is quite possible - and it is real common in some countries, notably the USA. It involves the woman putting her finger inside the guy's bottom and 'massaging' the prostate. This produces a little flow of clear fluid from the penis, and it can also help give the man a strong erection and a powerful orgasm.

However, I certainly do NOT suggest that you try this technique at the moment, while your husband is so worried about his prostate gland. He probably has quite enough on his mind already. I wish him well.

A. Sorry to hear about this. To be frank, I am a little doubtful that your hair loss is due to the Pill. However, why not stop it for a while and see what happens?

Yes, the drug Rogaine helps about 40 per cent of people to regain their hair. But if you want to maintain the hair growth, you have to apply it to your scalp daily for the rest of your life!

Could I suggest that you have a doc check out your scalp? By doing so, the doc may be able to find out the true reason for your distressful hair loss.

A. Unfortunately, there is no medication that will reliably reduce perspiration. What you need is to reduce your nervousness. Although either tranquilizers or beta-blocker drugs might help a little, they can have serious side effects. So the best thing would be to try and get yourself some good counselling to end your nervousness.

A. No, a thrombosis in a vein is a clot. It cannot become a cancer - so you can quit fretting.

A. Well, there are some rather 'bug-like' creatures which you can pick up while having sex with an infected person. One type is called 'pubic lice' and another is called 'scabies'. Incidentally, a condom does NOT protect one against these tiny creatures.

From your description, I am a little doubtful as to whether you have caught either of those infections. But clearly, it would be best to ask a doc to check out the vaginal opening and the pubic hair. Good luck!