I am a guy of 26, and I recently got married to a beautiful girl from Negril. But, unfortunately, she does not seem satisfied with my lovemaking, or the way we have sex. She doesn't often discharge.

When I asked her what is wrong, she burst into tears and said to me: "You don't give me any 'love play', do you?"

Things have now got so bad that last week we went to a doctor. I was hoping he would give my wife some tablets - to make her sexier. But instead, he told me that nothing was wrong with her.

In fact, he agreed with my wife. He said, "You don't give her any 'love play', and that is the real problem."

However, I do not know what they are talking about! I didn't have any complaints from previous girlfriends.

What exactly is this 'love play,' and what am I supposed to do? I would try it, doc, if it saved my marriage.

A Well, it is good that you are willing to change. It sounds like you will HAVE to do something; otherwise this marriage is going to break up.

And can I congratulate you on writing to me to enquire what love play is. Today, I shall do my best to explain. I am sure that what I am about to say will help you and your wife.

The words 'love play' mean what some people still call 'heavy petting', or 'fooling around', or 'touching up'. In other words, we are talking about stimulating the partner by means other than sexual intercourse.

Giving love play to women is tremendously important. Why? Because of the simple medical fact that most females DON'T get sufficiently turned on by intercourse alone. I would like you to remember these two points:

The average woman needs a good deal of love play before intercourse even starts - in order to put her 'in the mood' and get her lubricatory juices flowing.

Sexual intercourse by itself will NOT make most women discharge - they need love play as well.

So, if you are not giving your poor wife any love play, it is no wonder that she is feeling frustrated and upset.

So, what is it that she wants you to do? Well, most women long for a preliminary period of caressing BEFORE the guy attempts entry. In some surveys, females have said that they would usually like half an hour of that type of thing!

What caresses are we talking about? They can be divided into three types:

General caressing of the whole female body.

Caressing of the genital area with the guy's fingers.

Caressing of the genital area with the guy's mouth.

Let us look at these three activities in turn.

GENERAL CARESSING

A skilled lover generally begins by stroking the woman's faces, legs, back, arms and shoulders. Only gradually does he move on to her breasts.

In the first few minutes, he should avoid putting his hands on her genital area. He must also kiss her a lot!

FINGER CARESSING OF THE GENITAL AREA

Next, a skilful guy will move on to gentle stroking of the area of the vulva - that is, the opening of the vagina. If he does this properly, it will soon become very moist. He will usually take several minutes before switching his attention to the area of the clitoris. This has to be very gradually stimulated at first, using the 'pads' of the fingers.

MOUTH CARESSING OF THE GENITAL AREA

This is not obligatory, and not all guys like doing it. However, many women do really love it, providing it is carried out properly. Incidentally, it is a sure-fire route to orgasm for a lot of females. You need to start gently, applying your lips to the entire area, and then gradually concentrate on the region of the clitoris.

So that is a brief initial guide to the sort of love play which a man can offer to his partner. There is a lot more to it than that - for instance, the clever use of vibrators - which I will deal with in a later column.

But if you start out along the lines which I have indicated, I am quite sure that your wife will at least give you great credit for trying! I hope you succeed in saving your marriage.

Could liposuction on the larger breast deal with this problem for me? I would not want to have a silicone implant in the smaller one.

A Sorry to hear about this. Unequal breasts can be really embarrassing for a woman.

I am very doubtful about having liposuction on your bigger breast. The word 'liposuction' means 'surgical sucking out of fat'. I suspect that trying to suck out some fat would not do a lot of good, and that you might perhaps end up with an oddly shaped breast.

Instead, I think you should consider taking an operation to remove some breast tissue - rather than fat - from the larger mammary. I agree that putting an implant into the smaller breast - to push it up to a 42D - is not a sensible way to deal with the problem. So, if you can afford it, consult a plastic surgeon. I wish you well.

A As you say, it is normal for young women to produce a certain amount of secretion. Its appearance varies at different times of the month.

If you don't have any itching or discomfort, then it is probable that everything is OK. However, I feel you should get an internal check-up from a doc, just to make sure that everything is healthy.

A Likeliest cause is conjunctivitis. That is an inflammation of the membrane covering the eyeball. It is usually caused from a germ.

Ask a pharmacist to sell you some eyedrops or eye ointment. But, if these don't cure you within a week, check with a doc.

A No, you are not abnormal. Quite a few ladies learn to climax for the first time when they have passed through the menopause. And yes, there is every chance that you will now be able to orgasm regularly.

A doc has checked me out, told me I am fine, but I wonder if the pain is the reason why I am not getting pregnant?

A That is possible. I feel you need a fuller gynaecological investigation, and that may mean seeing a 'gyno'.

Also, is your husband the father of the child you had seven years ago? If not, then he may need tests for infertility. I wish you every good fortune in conceiving.