Rosemary Parkinson, Contributor

I will miss my family at Christmas. - Photos by Rosemary Parkinson

Christmas topics are actually everywhere. Parties abound - went to a lovely one last week at the official opening of Rainforest Seafoods Market in MoBay.

Delightful food that was! Fish and seafood are definitely in, and their deli is open for those who might not want to cook anything for Christmas.

Jokes

I have had tons of emails with hilarious jokes about Santa, electronic cards wishing me all the best accompanied by Yuletide music. But I do not feel Christmasy.

Maybe it's because I cannot get a flight out to my mother's in Barbados. I know I always leave booking late but, never before have had a problem booking it in the first week of December. There is not even a waiting list anymore with the airlines. It is all signed, sealed and delivered. There is nada out there unless a miracle happens. Where is everyone suddenly going? De planes coming and leaving with not an empty seat.

Right now I would allow them to put me in cargo if they would - but calls about that were met with a stern "Madam-can-we-send-you-an-ambulance? Trips to the madhouse are free."

Man, I am desperate. Every Christmas Eve my mother has open house and the world and its mothers are there. This year family from everywhere have their flights and will be present. The only one missing will be me. I shall be crying in my tin of soup. I refuse to cook Christmas dishes for myself.

And anyhow I feel the right to be petulant with no desire to go out looking for something to munch on Christmas Day. This food reviewer actually wants to be left alone - unless I can get to the land of flying fish for Christmas.

Depression

They say depression always hits at this time for those who are prone to it. I certainly am not the depressive type. But not home for Christmas when I am but a stone's throw from my mother's house is rather disconcerting. I will just have to sit and imagine Christmas Eve and pretend me there.

The buffet table filled with dishes of freshly-fried and highly seasoned flying fish. There will be my mother's special ham. My sister Laurel Ann's pea soup that soup afficionadoes consider the top of the line. Her Caribbean Recipes - Old & New Cookbook has just received awards from Spain, nominating it best cookbook from a woman chef. I offer her my congratulations now as I will not be seeing her to do so in person. My sister Brenda will probably make a potato and large green salad with a gorgeous creamy dressing. Roast pork, sliced in fine slivers served with a thick gravy will miss me.

The drinks table will be laden with Ponche Crema that is not mine (I am usually the mixer of that) and every other imaginable alcoholic drink, including probably bottles of sorrel and ginger beer to spike.

Cousins, aunts, uncles. Artists, lawyers, acountants, printers, music makers, bridge players. Husbands and wives and children who my mother has seen grown to be mothers themselves. All will be there. All, except, moi.

Christmas Day will be about family. Turkey and stuffing, ham again, a half of a suckling pig (my favourite). I will not be there to fry those plantains to perfection - my father (who we lost at Christmas 2004) always said I made the best. Jug Jug (a traditional Bajan dish of guinea peas and corn) will sit without me having spoonfuls. Gungo peas and rice. Stuffing and gravy galore. Sweet potato pie with grilled marshmallows on the top. And that plum pudding my mom makes from fruit she has been soaking in all manner of alcohols for months, and her absolutely divine brandy sauce that I usually eat the most of, and, and, and. No. No. No. This cannot be true.

Count your blessings

Well, what can I say? I should be counting my blessings. There are so many others who cannot even be upset because they will be going nowhere for Christmas. I leave all of you this Christmas with tidings of love. I wish all those who have been faithful readers of my column the very best of everything. I wish glad tidings to all who are travelling to fly safely. I urge all those who have not taken the time to give to someone more unfortunate, to do so.

I wish Jamaica a most happy and blessed Christmas. May the criminals this time of the year stop the crime, stop the shooting, stop the looting of minds and souls. May the prayers of all those who love their country be heard, and may this wonderful land live in peace and prosperity for many more Christmases. One love.

Rosemary Parkinson will be eating humble pie this Christmas and maybe corn beef and rice even.

Ponche Crema

In a large bowl beat 12 eggs.

Add slowly, mixing all the while, one bottle of rum of choice.

Continue to beat, adding 10 cans evaporated milk, 2 teaspoons of vanilla extract, four cans of condensed milk. More condensed milk can be added if mixture is not sweet enough.

Add half tablespoon of Angostura Bitters, 3 teaspoons of freshly grated nutmeg. Ensure ponche crema is well mixed.

Add the whole zest of one lime. Allow to sit for half and hour.

Bottle in sterilised bottles and refrigerate.

Serve cold on ice with a dash of Angostura drizzled with freshly grated nutmeg.