I read an article some time ago about a Chinese child who was hospitalised after being beaten at a camp for people addicted to the Internet.

Now, I'm not sure what disturbs me more; that he was beaten at a facility where the people were supposed to be helping him or that he became addicted to the Web in the first place. While it's true that the World Wide Web provides us with so much news, helpful tips and entertainment, this whole addiction thing caught me by surprise.

I think I just forgot that you can be addicted to things other than drugs. I wonder if you go through withdrawal symptoms when you're not able to browse? Can you imagine seeing someone lying on the floor, shivering, while mumbling the words, "Must get on Google" or "Email, I need email"? The only thing I've ever been close to being addicted to is football and, even then, I can't see myself watching three games consecutively on television.

As for the butt-whipping, the leader of the military-style camp said that physical punishment was an effective way to educate children, as long as it was done in a controlled way. Considering that the youngster (according to his mother) ended up with kidney and chest problems, that probably wasn't controlled. The lad was causing his mum too much grief because he was playing online games, not because he used to chase the neighbourhood cats and skin them alive. Pickney mus' get lick sometimes but not to this extreme.

Of course, the addiction camp is not licensed, nor are its methods condoned by health-care professionals. Why am I not surprised? Treatment methods include rigorous physical activities (is that supposed to make you too tired to go on the Internet?) and showing the participants other pastimes in which to indulge.

In this age, there are a million ways to fix any problem and, simultaneously, a million things that can go wrong with you in the first place. So this poor bloke was in a bad state from the beginning.

I wonder what we could get addicted to out here. Think there is anyone addicted to pan chicken or bulla and pear? I know people who are unapologetic about their love for mangoes and other fruits. Then there are those who can't do without their cellphones and iPods. I know folks who should be in rehab programmes for Twitter and Facebook usage. Then I could start my own camp and make their lives hell, calling it treatment. I could get some of the nurses to help me on the side to their regular jobs (they're not getting any money anyway). Addicts beware!

Check into rehab with me at daviot.kelly@gleanerjm.com.