POSITIVE Parenting

Why do people have an impulse to grab-grab a baby's hands? Don't they realise that their own hands carry many germs? Most of my friends and family have been very conscious about holding our son, or even coming to visit too soon, for fear of giving him an unwanted illness. "Kids at my daughter's school have chicken pox so I don't want to come and see him just in case," one friend said to me. Very thoughtful. "My child has a cold. I think it's best that I wait until next week to visit," another told me. Again, thoughtful.

His first trip out was a real eye-opener for me. I remember when I was a little girl, when women would stop and pinch my chubby cheeks, I'd sit there thinking, "Why oh why are you doing this to me?" However, I didn't know that it would annoy me, as a mother, to witness it happening to my baby. Anyway, I am always surprised when someone strokes his hands, like he's a cat. He puts these parts of his body into his mouth all the time for goodness sake! Can't they play with his feet instead? It's not as if he stretches those up to his face, yet! I mean, seriously, our baby boy is not a dolly. Sure, he looks like one, but he really isn't.

Personal contact

Some, and I stress some, people are good about washing before touching, but most aren't. Either way, they don't HAVE to 'pet' my child. It's like they have an innate urge to make personal contact with babies. Why? You are a complete stranger to me, let alone to my child! You wouldn't exactly take my arm in yours, or give me a large hug now would you? Why do you feel the need to do it to the baby? At the very least, ask first. I'd say no, but why does it matter so much to you?

The outbreak of swine flu has been all over the news for months and everywhere I turn there are posters about washing hands frequently and covering your mouth with tissue when you cough. Thousands of people all over the world have been getting very sick because of this virus, so I shouldn't be having to write this article. Yet I am.

While I believe that a bit of dirt harms no one, and that it's better for one's immune system when the environment around you is not completely sterile, there are ailments like diarrhoea and influenza which I do not wish the little fellow to pick up. He is welcome to the soil in the garden! And when he's agile enough to gather spilt raisins off the dining room floor I won't stop him from retrieving those. In this case, though, the 'five- second' rule will apply!

The best is when people thrust their hands in front of my son, he takes hold of one of their fingers, and said person gets all excited. They think that the dear boy has singled them out, as if they are so special, and decided to squeeze their digit alone! "Oh look," they'll say, "He likes me." Notice I use the plural 'they'. That's because he'll do it to everybody! It's a reflex. He's only a couple months old and there is no one he doesn't like just yet. You wait though, in a few years he'll be pushing your hands away and wondering to himself, "What's been this obsession with touching babies?"

emmadaltonbrown@gmail.com