Heather Little-White, Ph.D., Contributor

Recent reports in The Sunday Gleaner about young children being involved in sex are alarming. There are accounts of young children and unsuspecting adults being lured into sexual activities with which they are unfamiliar. These activities include oral sex, orgies and threesome sex.

The thought of three people engaging in sex is quite repulsive to many, even more so when you have been pressured to engage in it. While some may fantasise about being part of the world of threesomes, they may find that they end up getting more than what they bargained for.

What is a threesome anyway? It is a sexual relationship or event that occurs within a set of three people. There are no set of rules for doing a threesome a prescribed way and what sexual practices to involve. The important criterion is that there are three participants. The usual combination is you, your current partner and another person of either gender.

Friends or strangers

The combinations can be two females and one male, for example, when one man invites out two ladies; two males and one female who may go out together, and in gay and lesbian relationships it could be three males or females. The participants of a threesome could be friends, acquaintances, or even strangers. Some people get acquaintances and friends into their threesome and this has ruined several friendships.

Sherada, now 20, is still suffering from the trauma of a forced threesome when at age 18 her boyfriend of 28 forced her to participate in a threesome with him and another girl with whom she was acquainted. It was supposed to be a treat for her 18th birthday, but it turned out to be an experience with long-lasting, unpleasant memories.

She could never imagine that she could have been chained to a bed while her boyfriend made love to her. What was most repulsive, though, was another female caressing her breasts as she was homophobic, influenced by her father's intolerance for homosexuality. Sherada knew that she had no homosexual tendencies and found it difficult to condition herself to being touched by a member of the same sex.

Moral convictions

Unsuspecting persons who are approached should be careful about how they agree to sex with multiple partners. Persons, especially young people, who go out in groups should be aware of what sexual activities can take place, especially under the influence of alcohol and drugs. It is best to lose the friendships than renege on your moral convictions.

Threesomes may have negative emotional outcomes, especially if one partner is doing it merely to please the other. If your partner keeps pushing for a threesome fantasy, try to determine the reason for the desire for this sexual experience, to determine if there is sexually inadequacy on your part. You may need to meet with a counsellor if the demand continues.

Even when you are tempted to go along with the practice, the risk of contracting sexually transmitted infections should not be ignored. The practice of safe sex is essential with threesomes as with other sexual activities. You can never be too sure about the sexual history of the threesome participants.

With the steady increase in HIV/AIDS, threesomes increase the risk of becoming infected by not one but two persons involved in threesome sex activities, which may include vaginal penetration, oral sex and deep kissing.

Feelings of betrayal

Threesomes can cause feelings of jealousy and betrayal and can ruin relationships. The people who often have problems after a threesome are the ones who are very deeply involved with their partner. Some people permanently lose respect for their partners after a threesome. The reality of seeing your partner being intimate with another person creates jealousy and feelings of betrayal.

Sex education has to address changing lifestyles and the increase in the practice of unusual sexual activities. Older men and women will lure younger partners to engage in all types of sexual experiences for one reason or the other. Parents should encourage children to report attempts to include them in sexual activities including those of a risqué nature.

Threesome sex is a thrilling risk often encouraged by friends. Young people and adults should be careful about neglecting to take care of their health by not practising safe sex. This can result in terrible consequences to all concerned. Besides, the emotional trauma of sex in threes is enormous, and could ruin their prospects of a healthy sex life.

Name changed for privacy