Dear Counsellor:

I have problems with my weight. I am not able to lose the excess weight. And when I do lose it, I regain it eventually. I am labelled as obese and am trying to avoid the complications of obesity.

- Gwen

Dear Gwen:

Weight problems are very common among the population. There is a behavioural aspect to weight management as well as an emotional component. There are also the physical and spiritual aspects.

Weight management has to be viewed holistically. Physically, we need to pay attention to diet, exercise and lifestyle changes.

Speak with a dietitian and an exercise trainer to develop a programme for weight reduction. The dietitian will assess your caloric requirements, portion sizes, varieties of food and frequency of meals. Food has different caloric contents, so your choice of foods will have to be regulated.

Exercise is important as you will burn calories, tone muscles and lose fat. Exercise and diet planning have to be viewed as lifelong activities. Sometimes you may relapse, but you have to get back with the programme.

Many people eat whenever they see food, not because they are hungry. Food carries a soothing component. People eat to comfort themselves, to reward themselves and to make themselves feel happy.

The emotional and behavioural aspects to eating have to be considered, as these will jeopardise the diet and exercise programme. In life, there are periods of loneliness, unhappiness and sadness.

Some people find that they eat more when they are undergoing stressful situations. Keep a diary to assess your eating pattern for one week. Make notes of the periods when you are moody and observe what you have eaten.

Food is everywhere and so you have to discipline yourself to eat only a certain amount at certain times. Try to deal with your unhappiness in other ways. Many times we become negative in our thoughts and behaviour. You need to approach weight management in a positive light and work towards small gains and be prepared for setbacks. With regard to setbacks, you need to be motivated to persevere with the programme.

Spirituality is important, as we all need to have a personal relationship with God. You need to pray daily and get others to pray for you. Prayer is helpful because it calms your fears and gives hope and understanding, as well as aids in renewal.

Dear Counsellor:

I have just been diagnosed with cancer. I felt devastated and wish to die right away. My family has been trying to motivate and encourage me.

- Sonia

Dear Sonia:

A diagnosis of cancer is distressing and it impacts on the entire family as well as friends.

There are certain questions that you need to ask your specialist. You need to find out how advanced is the cancer and what treatment you will need. The doctor will explain things to you. You should get a close relative to accompany you to the doctor.

Sometimes, you may not understand the issues as you are fearful and distressed. A relative will help tremendously.

You will need spiritual support, so you need to pray daily and ask others to pray for you. Don't give up hope as some cancers can be treated and your mortality not affected. Get as much information as you can about the cancer, the treatment and the prognosis. Information can be used to help to make decisions and guide your care.