Dear Counsellor:

I am planning to go overseas to study. I have financial constraints and would like some direction.

- Sarah

Dear Sarah:

It is good to pursue tertiary-level education as it will improve your chances of getting a good job. As with any project you need to plan ahead and do things a little at a time. Finances are most important. If you are working, you should be saving very aggressively. Think of which family members will be able to help you financially. If you have relatives abroad, you may be able to live with them.

There are also scholarships, grants and loans. You may need to work part-time to supplement your income. Many times, work-and-study is the way to go.

You need to choose a course of study that will benefit you in the job market. Make a budget and identify income sources and ways to reduce expenditure. Many college students wear jeans and T-shirts and try to eat nutritiously.

Is the course available locally? Sometimes it is cheaper to study locally and it might be more convenient. These are the days of Internet degree courses so perhaps you should consider that option. Some colleges can be accessed locally.

Going overseas has its ups and downs. The experience can be exciting but you might become homesick. Consider carefully your options and choose wisely.

Dear Counsellor:

I am a mother of an adolescent with bipolar disorder. I am having great difficulty coping with his illness. I feel ashamed to have a child with that problem. I don't tell people about this because I am embarrassed.

- Marline

Dear Marline:

Your feelings reflect those of many parents who discover that their children have this problem. There is a stigma attached to mental illness which sometimes impairs the treatment of the mentally ill.

Individuals and their families have to deal with their feelings of shame, embarrassment and disgrace. We all like things to go well and when our children are strangely different we feel humiliated. You need to recognise these feelings and move on with your life. You are not alone and you need to exercise your faith in God.

Adjustment to a situation is not easy as we have to cope with feelings and behaviours, and perform various activities. Nobody went out and brought mental illness upon himself. If anything people would rather run from sickness.

Medical illness

Mental illness has to be viewed as a medical illness like HIV and diabetes. It is a chronic illness which needs to be managed appropriately. You need to work with your psychiatrist to support your son.

Treatment involves the family and his peers. The family needs to be supportive of your son. The family needs counselling and education about the condition. There are support groups for family members and the patient. Caregiver support groups are important as members get assistance and educate each other.

There is a support group for families with mental illness in Jamaica. The name of the group is MENSANA.The meetings are held the second Saturday of every month at 10 a.m. at the Quaker building in Cross Roads. Please attend the meetings. You will always be welcome.

Email questions about family or personal problems to Dr Yvonnie Bailey-Davidson at yvonniebd@hotmail.com or call her at 978-8602 or 791-1778.