Ditta Sylvester, Contributor
A variety of herbs and roots used to make roots drinks. - file

The day she lost her father, Miss Alma began to hate doctors and anything scientific, even more than she did before. Such things were either totally wrong or borderline sinful, as far as Miss Alma was concerned.

Old Jake had been still writhing with pain after she had given him several doses of Jack-in-di-bush and Cerasee tea, when she finally decided to take Millicent's advice and send for Gerald.

Why you neva call mi long time, Alma? Gerald asked reprovingly as Jake groaned in the back seat of the taxi. Jake shouda did reach hospital long, long time!

Jus drive! Alma retorted sharply.

As she watched the old man in his distress, Alma's mind went back to her life with him. Her mother had died giving birth to her and Jake had raised her alone. He had never taken another woman and the two worked the land which had once belonged to Alma's maternal grandfather.

Jake had not liked the man she had rejected Gerald for but had kept his disapproval much to himself. It was only when that young man had dared to raise his hand against his daughter that Jake had stepped in and defended her. They had not seen him since. Millicent was born almost seven months to the day her father had left Alma for good.

They got to the hospital and Jake was prepped and ushered into theatre. He died on the operating table.

Miss Almas grief had been almost unbearable but even more worrying was the thought that her father might not have found a proper resting place. It was Jake himself who had convinced her that whatever organ the good Lord placed in a person should remain there until death. Alma worried that Jakes soul was still wandering some place between hell and heaven, because he had been unable to report to the pearly gates with his appendix in place.

It was about five years later that Millicent graduated from nursing school. On the first morning her daughter donned her white uniform Miss Alma persuaded the girl to walk with her to the crossing, instead of waiting at home on Gerald. At every gate they passed, including those of the people she had not spoken to in years, Alma called out a loud Good morning.

Dem grudge wi, bad! she grinned and whispered to Millicent.

Millicent had been working at the hospital for close to a year when her mother developed a serious medical condition and was admitted to the same hospital.

What happening? Miss Alma asked fearfully.

Doctor not sure, Millicent told her. How you feeling now?

Not so bad, she answered. When dem sending me home? I have mi business to look, bout, you know.

Forget about that, Mom, Millicent said. You are very sick. In fact, she hesitated.

What? Miss Alma asked.

The doctor would like to do exploratory surgery on you. Just to try to find out what exactly is causing ...

Miss Alma sat bolt upright.

You let mi down! she scolded the girl. After you see how docta use knife kill off yuh grandpa, you really want dem to do me di same ting?

But ...

Dont but mi! Miss Alma interrupted, swinging her legs decisively off the bed. Jus get mi clothes if you know what good fi you!

Miss Alma went home, boiled down and drank whatever bush remedy she thought appropriate to her condition. Within a few days, she felt fine again. That is, until Millicent came home from work one evening and found her unconscious on the floor.

Gerald was sitting by her bed when she woke up in hospital the morning after.

Tank God, you revive! he declared happily.

Gerald? Miss Alma said vaguely. What happen? Is which part mi is?

You inna hospital, Gerald told her. Docta move a big, big tumour from you belly. You soon aright now.

Miss Alma groaned.

They sat in silence until Gerald told her he had to leave.

Aright, Miss Alma answered weakly. But I beggin you a favour.

What?

I have a root a single bible right at mi front door step, she told him. Beg you water it fi mi. Dat is di best ting fi wash out all di drugs dem goin give mi inna dis place!

How you own way so, Alma? Gerald asked. Dem not going give you anyting what not good for you.

How you sure, bout dat? Miss Alma asked.

Gerald shook is head.

If you neva so stubborn, me and you would be man and wife right now! he told her.

You coming wid dat foolishness again? Alma asked, impatiently.

Aright, teck it easy! Gerald cautioned, putting his cap back on. Mi wi water di single bible.

So Miss Alma was cured of her malady despite her resentment of the method used. She still feels somewhat betrayed and is not quite sure that she was not relieved of some vital body part while she lay unconscious and unable to protect herself from the surgeon.

Just in case, she has made up with most of her former enemies. She has decided that the prudent thing to do would be to lead a life so faultless that the Lord will be compelled to let her into heaven, even if she went up missing a body part or two.