Angela Philipps, Gleaner Writer

Ladies, I'm afraid this week's criticism is directed at you. Time and again I get accused of not writing from the guy's prospective (uh, hello, I'm a girl!!!) Although this is not exactly true, the majority of my articles do focus on a single woman's plights and joys. Not that men are not able relate to these on some level, or even learn from them!

I received a very thought-provoking email from a new reader (so he tells me) last week. I was particularly interested in what he had to say in the second paragraph, about the role of women in this day and age.

Rare Man

"Most women refuse to take responsibility for the outcome of their relationships, and you will hear about all the things the bastard did, but never the things she did, or fail to do. Nobody promised us a fair life, so we men often just deal with it and take the blame for the broken relationships. Speaking for me personally, I am very picky and the typical woman is just not my type, so their actions do not bother me.

"Good women are, in my experience, even rarer than you ladies make out a good man to be. Some women are so confused by the changing role of the female in this new generation, they often get lost in identifying a good man when they meet one. Some women carry around so much baggage from their broken relationships, the only solution I can recommend for them would be complete reprogramming ... From the advice and comments you have made in the article I read on Sunday, you may know what you want, but do you know how to get and keep it when you find him?

"Tell me."

- Rare Man

I don't believe that very many of us single gals out there are aware of being confused about our roles in modern life, but it doesn't mean that this statement is false. Up to well past the mid-20th century, few women worked in prestigious professions. Often, one would move directly from her parent's house into that of her husband. Her duties would be to be a good wife and mother, taking care of all the domestic chores. The most she might expect her spouse to do is take out the garbage on the weekend! The system worked because men would go to their jobs and women would stay at home. It was simply what happened.

Change of the times

As the last century was not much more than a score from ending, the concept of a woman taking equal positions to men in the workplace was not unheard of. This has continually increased, and now we're seeing highly educated and intelligent women in prominent positions in banks, insurance companies, politics, and many other realms of business.

The problem is, women are still the only gender who can give birth to babies. In nature, we remain the nurturers. I know men can be a part of helping with children as they grow up, but they cannot carry them to term, nor breastfeed. Aside from that, our general innate desire to have a baby has not gone away. However, we choose to push this out of our way. We want the career. We like having the independence, and for that we need the money.

The result can be phenomenally satisfying for each one of us who decide to take this pathway, but it can also be detrimental to our love lives. A girl might find herself being overly demanding, 'high maintenance', as it's called, or possibly moving along with a heavy load of resentment towards ex-boyfriends, thinking that men are always the ones in the wrong. Perhaps being a single lass in today's world has forced us to focus solely on number one - ME. But being so wrapped up in ourselves can cause us to be blind to who that ACTUAL perfect man is.

angelaphilippsja@hotmail.com.

diannafoxydiva@yahoo.com