Angela Philipps, Contributor

Try eight times! Oh yes, I have, hanging in my closet, eight old bridesmaid outfits, only three of which you'd catch me wearing again. The others will continue to collect dust until I can come up with something useful to do with them (the materials are not good for dusting - I've tried). One made me look like a fairy (a grown woman in pink tulle - honestly!), another gave me close resemblance to a geisha, twice I looked as if I was heading to a posh ball at Buckingham Palace - but we were on the beach, and once I was, in fact, in a pinstripe suit as someone's best man! But let me not dwell on what my friends wanted me to wear to their weddings. I aim to please!

According to the saying, I will never get married. But aren't there benefits of being part of the wedding party? Doesn't it guarantee a little 'action' on the romance front? I mean, this is what people tell me all the time. Let me think back …

Grand time on dance floor

OK, I can only count one time when I sparked a guy's interest, and I've been single at every marriage I've worn one of the above outfits. I'm not complaining about the lack of love on these occasions though, as I seem to remember having a grand old time on the dance floor at each.

The point I am trying to get to (but keep distracting myself) is the expense a chick like me spends on every marriage I have witnessed. When I was a young little thing, the burden of shower and wedding gifts, hotel rooms, and sometimes flights, outfits and jewellery, was all on my parents. For the last 10 to 15 years the financial load has been on me.

Have you seen the episode of Sex and the City when the show's lead character, Carrie Bradshaw, is forced to leave a new pair of Manolo shoes just inside the doorway of her friend's apartment? On leaving the party, she discovers that her footwear has been stolen! Not understanding why she is upset, the friend whose home it is lends her a pair of sneakers.

Outraged by this, Carrie tells her lawyer friend, Miranda, what has happened. The latter says she must demand to be paid for the missing shoes. Carrie pursues this quest, only to be laughed at for spending an outrageous sum of money on 'frivolous' items. After calculating that a single gal can spend more than US$2,000 on one friend's engagement, bridal shower, wedding gift, baby shower, and birthday presents for resulting kids, Carrie sends an 'invitation' to said friend. It announces Carrie's marriage to herself, and inside the envelope are details about her registry … one pair of Manolo silver high heels! Touché, my girl …

Where are our gifts

You must see what I am getting at here. Why are lone ladies not recipients of fabulous gifts simply because of their relationship status? What about having an 'I'm moving into my own home' registry? Isn't the bridal one designed for a couple starting out in a new house anyway? Surely, we could extend this tradition to the working singletons of the world. Is getting sets of bone china, lead crystal and silver cutlery the rewards for tying the knot? And what about all that sexy lingerie the bride is given? Hey, aren't unattached girls in more need of boosting bras? The bride already has a man!

I'm not implying that those who are legally hitched don't deserve the lavish treatment. After all, it's a very happy and special ritual for people to go through. I just feel that being on one's own can really tug on the bank balance, and it would be nice to know that if I am never a bride I'll still get help setting up my nest.

angelaphilippsja@hotmail.com