Amina Blackwood Meeks, Contributor
ONE SYMBOL of the failure of what we are now calling civilisation is the number of cars. That's according to Miss Lady and she was not talking about the hundreds of them piled up at gas stations recently or running around wasting out dem gas trying to find gas on account of some impending gas strike.
No, Miss Lady says she distinctly means de whole heap a car she see pan de road at peak hour wid one so-so deggeh-deggeh smaddy in each one. She say everytime she see a car like dat, she see somebody who doan have nobaddy to talk to, at least not when it matters and not when dem in de best mood to talk.
Miss Lady sey once upon a time, before car get so prevalent, people who live in de same house, even if dem not blood relatives use to have more tings to talk about. One somebody was de designated driver. Dat one do de dropping off and de picking up. Dat task lead to de development of odda skills like time management. For if de dropping off teck too long somebody else late fe work or school.
Now if de picking up pick up too late somebody vex till dem blue, mout long. So de skills of conflict avoidance and conflict resolution if it can't avoid come in big-big. Next ting is dat people who sharing de same cyar learn bout accountability. You have to give explanations to somebody else if is even fe account fe why yu late. If everything gwaan copasetic now, is a different kind of conversation tekking place.
MAWNIN PEAK HOUR
Take, for example, mawnin peak hour. That is usually after everybody finish de process of dragging demself out of de bed, automatically reach for something to break de fast, bathe, get dressed and reach a point where dem could feel like a human being, tell everybody else a pleasant good morning, get into a state such that they could set out to pursue whatever human beings pursue after such an ordeal. According to Miss Lady, once upon a time that used to be the time when de whole generation pack up into dem likkle wedda-shall-we-reach, and set out to where dem going.
Yu see dem time a mawnin in dem days dere, chattin spwile. Dat's when children learn all de details bout where dem parents work, get to find out is exackly what dem do behind dem job title, and parents hear bout which teacher class de child have dat dem daon want to go to and get to find out chu dat one likkle confession eveyting dat going on in dat substantial part of de child's life. She sey dat get cut out. Everybody into dem own separate car. Tree people into four car. No conversation. Nobody know de sorrows of de next one heart. Each one rush out an gane wid nat even a likkle assurance from de adda wan dat whatever burden dem leave wid going to get lighter by de time day done. For de night before dem never have time to hear it neida. Everybody did come home pan dem own schedule into dem owna car an if dem duh talk is bout how traffic hole dem up an which road-hog nearly shub dem offa de road. So dem head to dem room fe cool off. So tired dem drop a sleep an be de time dem wake is jus fe start de whole cycle again.
OWNA CAR
Mawnin time now, every body now into dem owna car. Dem and de mawning talk show host a solve de problems of de world but nat a soul fe help wid fe dem personal burden. She sey even when she used to vex sey every room have dem owna teevee, an no two baddy watching de same show, at least when dem get into de same car dem use to swap stories bout which show dem was watching de night before. Now, even dat cut out.
Once upon a time again, at least yu cudda get fe quarrel when de picker-upper pick yu up late and when de quarrel finish over dat an yu sey yu sarry an meck up yu get to realise how much yu love de person and yu resolve to yuself nuh fe have dem foolish quarrel dere again. Now all dat cut out. Even time management gane because nobody don't have to synchronise time wid nobaddy but demself.
So Miss Lady sey we have to be careful of how we call ole time people uncivilised. For how we is living wid we objects of development and progress is very uncivil. Ole time people did civil. Dem did fine time fe siddung an talk to wan anedda not jus grunt de grunt dat we grunting an tink sey it qualify as something. Is our behaviour disrupt de pattern of real conversation dat use to hole people togedda. Is so come tings turn uncivil. She sey a so comes we come to dis. Everybody a wonder what de whole a dem tinking. An when dem hear it pan de talk show we shock. Forty tousen different call pan a equal number of topic an none nuh get explore so none nuh get solve an two and half million people a walk roun feel sey de burden too heavy fe bear an dem kean fine de way fe put it dung.
Miss Lady sey is talk we have to begin to talk not just exchange words. Come outa de ton load a car dem what pack up de road an jus giwi something else fe grumble bout an talk. Talk till you find a way fe you an yu family find one problem dat you can solve. Next ting yu find one dat de whole neybourhood can solve. We have to talk till we reach consensus an find something we can all hold on to.
