Patricia Watson, Features Coordinator
Tafesu Abera (centre), an Ethiopian orphan who lost both her parents through HIV/AIDS, sits outside her family house with her brother Endashew (left) and sister Yeshiwork at a village near the capital Addis Ababa. The United Nations' children's charity UNICEF estimates that there are 20 million orphans across Africa. In Ethiopia alone there are up to 4.5 million orphans -- higher than the total population of some African states.
DEAR MOM,
I am writing this letter to tell you how much I miss you. Sometimes when I sit and I remember all the things we did, I cry. Sometimes I dream of you too and sometimes I feel like they do not love me at home. When I sit by myself, I always think about you. I miss your hugs and your kisses because since you have gone, no one has kissed me or hugged me at home. Only my teacher does so at school.
I will always cherish the good times we had together. Although I was only five years old, I still remember your smiling face and those big love kisses. Although you are dead, I want you to be proud of me. That's why I would like to become a teacher. I like when I am at school because I feel happy and I play with my friends. Mom, I know you are watching me. I know you are protecting me. I will always have you in my heart.
Your daughter S.
At nine years old, S has already suffered the emotionally devastating impact of losing a parent. But this is no ordinary loss. She lost her mother, her sole caregiver, friend, confidant, to HIV/AIDS. In some societies, the pain of losing such an important part of her life to the deadly disease might have been cushioned by love and support.
LIVELY DEBATES
But here in Jamaica, the country is still largely struggling to reconcile with whether persons infected or affected deserve to be treated with respect. There are still lively debates as to whether it is safe to touch or hug, and 'respectable' families are still resorting to relegating home-made plates and mugs for infected relatives.
Indeed, the loss of a parent to AIDS, according to experts, can lead to children becoming withdrawn and passive or in some instances lead to depression, sadness, anger, fear, and antisocial behaviours. The HIV/AIDS epidemic has disrupted the lives of thousands of children in Jamaica, causing much hardship, pain and fear.
Just the mention of HIV reduces nine-years old P to tears. She is consumed with thoughts of death and constantly worries about her infected mother.
"Sometimes I'm at school and my mother can't find the money to give to us and we are so hungry. When she was working, she used to go to wholesale and give us everything that we need. I don't want to die. I don't want to die and leave my mother and sisters. I love them, I love all my family and I really don't want to die," P explained through tears.
VULNERABLE
Recent estimates show that worldwide, more than 14 million children under the age of 15 have lost one or both parents to AIDS. By 2010, this number is expected to rise to more than 25 million (UNAIDS, 2004).
In Jamaica, more than an estimated 10,000 children have lost one or more parents to AIDS. An estimated 35,000 children under the age of 18 have been made vulnerable as a result of HIV/AIDS. Overall, five to seven per cent of all orphans in Jamaica are due to HIV/AIDS (Ministry of Health).
Many suffer at the hands of friends, relatives, communities long before they are orphaned.
Norais a 27-year-old mother of three girls, ages 10, eight and four. She found out she was HIV-positive when she was pregnant with her last child.
"I worry about my daughters, because I really wouldn't want anything to happen to them. Especially my first daughter, T, who is infected, I worry about her a lot. I don't want anything to happen to her.
LOVE HER DAUGHTERS
At times, they do things that make me angry, but I love them so much. At one point, I told my aunt that I would come back for them, because when I die, there is nobody to take care of them. Even with me alive, when I used to work and leave them at their grandmother when I come back, their aunt and cousins hit them and do things to them. When I'm not around, they treat them really bad. Some weeks ago, when they were at my brother's house, his wife chased T out of the house saying that she didn't want to catch anything from her and cleaned the chair she was sitting in," Nora stated.
All across Jamaica, HIV/AIDS has been leaving behind significant emotional devastation. In a study, Barriers to the Integration of HIV/AIDS infected/affected children into the Jamaican School System, by Wilma Bailey and Affette McCaw-Binns, the authors noted that "HIV/AIDS has created a crisis in family life." They also found that most parents took great pains to keep their status a secret from their children. But for those who know their parents status or are aware of that they themselves are infected, the impact can be hard.
Bailey and McCaw-Binns noted that parents interviewed believed that their children were not performing in school due to the parents or their positive status. The parents of affected children used words such as 'depressed' and 'withdrawn' to describe their children. One parent said:
BLEEDING INSIDE
"She was bright, but everything is going down. She goes to school but her mind is not there. If I had money, I would send her to a professional." Another noted: "Recently, my son was in a corner by himself. He doesn't talk about it. I know he is bleeding inside."
The authors further explained that parents of infected children unanimously stated their children were not coping academically:
"I notice that he is not learning anything ? he doesn't know all the letters of the alphabet ? I went to the school and they asked him to repeat seventh grade."
Children whose parents are infected or who are infected themselves are often ostracized. Fourteen-year-old Petralives in fear of rejection everyday. Her mother told The Sunday Gleaner that she frequently misinterprets things people say and then withdraws and is depressed for long periods.
FINANCIAL CONSTRAINTS
Many, due to lack of funds often drop out or attend school irregularly. Some parents find it difficult to provide proper nutrition for the children and at least one of the infected parents and child interviewed for this series had not eaten between sun up and the afternoon of the interview.
A study conducted by executive director of the National HIV/STI Programme, Dr. Yitades Gebre found that 56 per cent of persons infected by HIV in Jamaica are unemployed or out of work. Most persons infected were also found to be living below the poverty line.
"My first daughter is infected. I always made sure she has her medication, that she has enough food to eat and that she is happy. But I just lost my job, so I'm up and down now trying to get a job now. You know with three girls and school, I really need to get a job to take care of them - I don't want anything to happen to them," Lisa, an infected mother said her voice breaking as she tries to prevent herself from crying.
"I was at home for three weeks and when I went back to work, I got a phone call to go in to see the doctor. I asked my boss for the time off to go and he said I could go. After that visit, I had to go back again and so I explained to him that I was very ill and had to see the doctor again. He said he needed proof and so I told him about my situation. I showed him the papers I got to do the blood test. He started to curse and told me bad words. He said I knew I had HIV for so long and didn't tell anyone and he would have to have a meeting with management because they must know about it. And he has other workers who he has to consider. I told him that if he was going to hold a meeting and tell everybody about it, I would leave and he said fine. I left. I never received any payment because they said I walked off the job.
"I really need to find a job to help the kids, because I really don't like walking up and down and begging for assistance. Sometime I really feel badly doing it," Lisa said.
As is evident HIV/AIDS carries a myriad of financial burdens, unemployment being a major player. Many parents are unable to meet the cost of even subsidised medicine and the food necessary for infected children.
"The high level of unemployment means the need for support for children is tremendous. Support for school, food, psychological care is inadequate and need to be improved," Dr. Gebre told The Gleaner.
He further noted that only three per cent of those infected had any meaningful support and that, in addition to the high unemployment rate is "good reason to double our efforts."
Experts also point out that AIDS increases the risk that children will end up on the street, where they are liable to be sexually abused or become involved in criminal activities.
"AIDS undermines children's lives, and the fear of a lost generation is strong. If nothing is done, the risk of not meeting the Millenium Development Goals is high, and the prospect of future socio-economic development will remain gloomy" (World Bank, 2004).
The World Bank further noted that with "too little education and knowledge gathered from their parents, as well as being deprived of parental love and guidance throughout their childhood, the children of AIDS victims later become adults who themselves are less able to raise their own children and to invest in their education. The process is insidious, since the effects are felt only over the long-run, as the poor education of children today translates into low adult productivity a generation later, and so on."
Much more needs to be done
While helping orphans and vulnerable children is a priority for the Jamaican Government, Dr. Gebre pointed out some huge gaps in the care and support of affected and infected children.
One of the worst effects of vulnerability is the psychological impact of HIV/AIDS.
"We need to work on psychological support for orphans and vulnerable children. In Jamaica, we have very good extended family support, we need to make use of this. Coping is difficult for the children," Dr. Gebre said.
But apart from psychological support, Dr. Gebre noted there is a vast shortage of material support - food supplies, health services, school fees. One of the major problems being faced is that some parents refuse to apply for assistance for their children.
Community support, while evident in some areas, are woefully lacking in others. Some communities play a major role in ostracising children and so there is need for more community interventions. There is also need for greater access to education, especially infected and affected boys.
Over the next week, join the Gleaner as children infected and affected with HIV/AIDS speak out about issues of concern to them in pictures or in prose. Tomorrow: 'A little girl's struggle' and 'Hope lives here'
Taken from The Sunday Gleaner, July 17, 2005 
