Contributed
Party-goers frolic in the sand at James Bond Beach last year.I HAVE A friend called 'Lenny' who is an out-and-out carnival freak. Just whisper the word 'J'Ouvert' around him, and his ears prick up and his body does an involuntary excited little jiggle. Some people laugh at his condition, his friends 'card' him mercilessly but I understand what he's going through. He's got 'J'Ouvert Fever'.
My first J'Ouvert experience occurred in Trinidad in 1999 where I 'bleached' for the whole night jamming to soca hits and steel pan music. The streets were packed with people you'd have thought the buildings were in. I met a little hottie named Melissa from the hills of Lavantille, Trinidad, who had a definite hint of 'I'm easy' written all over her bodacious bod.
We jammed through the streets, on top of cars, with wild abandon, and I was sure I was gonna get lucky until...we got separated just before dawn. I cursed my luck that night; Melissa's eyes and her body (mostly her body) haunt my dreams still. I was so close. Anyways, since that quirk of fate that night, the spirit of J'Ouvert has possessed my very soul. And the annual Bacchanal Jamaica Beach J'Ouvert at James Bond Beach is a best of all worlds scenario: achingly beautiful women in itsy bitsy bikinis, suggestive soca music and a gorgeous beach.
Last year, I had a fab time at James Bond Beach. Women, women everywhere, metres and metres of them just spread before you like salvation. And the serpent said unto Adam: Forget about Eve. Drink and be merry!
Carnival is delicious temptation.
You should have seen Lenny last year. He was in his element, dressed in an Adidas peak, an Adidas shirt, new sneaks and an Oakley shades. I spotted him coming from the bar a few times with a beer in his right hand, and an Appleton mixed drinks in his left. He claimed the Appleton was for his 'empress'. Yea, right.
When I caught up with him the following day at the hotel, he claimed he had lost his camera, his new sneaks, and even his underpants. He must have had a helluva time.
The finest women in Jamaica go to carnival events. Clean skin, flat midriffs, and hard, well-toned bodies. I know girls who bleach at only one time of year carnival. And there are girls who I met in high school who I only see at one time of year carnival.
And where is the best place to see quality women - semi-intoxicated, semi-naked and their bodies giving off pheromones - in abundance at one time per year? You guessed it. Beach J'Ouvert. Some of my friends don't like carnival. They claim the word bacchanal is 'gayese' for 'back-anal', a secret code of homosexuals. They point to 'gay-sitings' of packs of effeminate men dancing like women at the Friday night events to drive home their point.
But I don't buy it.
I ignore the questionable guys. Ah just woman mi come fi look pon...straight! When I go to carnival, I don't have to worry about getting shot, or trampled by scared patrons.
People can bun carnival all they want but this year's all-inclusive Beach J'Ouvert on March 30 at James Bond Beach won't miss me. I love to see the revellers paint themselves in various colours, and frolick like crazed nymphs around the bonfire at sunset. You can almost smell the funk of sex in the air. One of my favourite artistes will be there, Soca Monarch winner Iwer George, as well as his brother Nya who sang 'Trinidad' the 2002 Road March Winner this year.
I can smell the sea already. J'Ouvert...J'Ouvert...J'Ouvert.
Claude Mills
You can e-mail me at cmillsy@yahoo.com
