How to give a wedding toast

By Glenda Anderson, Staff Reporter

HOPEFULLY WE are long past the days of daggers, swords and poisoned cups, but for the individual who toasted the bride and groom ages ago, trust was everything.

The glass was raised with the right or weapon hand extended from the shoulder, because it was not unusual to find a dagger in the hand or hidden in the many folds of clothing. This traditional position proved that the toaster had come in friendship.

A toast was a salute or pledge with a drink to the newlyweds and their guests. It was never tea or coffee but could be champagne, wine or a non-alcoholic beverage. It was essential to the ceremony as it gave the main guests a chance to express the collective feeling. Importantly it was a signal for the wedding to progress from the formal to the informal stage.

This pledge was led by a faithful friend or dear relative and often fell to the best man. He would introduce the young couple in a less formal way, as well as rouse the gathering in pronouncing blessings upon their new life. The salute was then accompanied by much noise and fanfare as it was thought that this would ward off evil spirits. (Enter the custom of clinking of glasses or forks and ringing of bells after the toast).

It was served first to the bride then to the groom, maid of honour, then parents and the best man and ended with a formal indication to alert the guests on what to say.

In recent years the traditional toast to the bride and groom has all but replaced the toast to the bride. For the non-traditional partners there are different additions to suit the occasion; the master of ceremonies may propose a toast to the couple, the bride or groom may prefer to stand and propose toasts to each other. Guests who so desire may also offer toasts.

A more liberal celebration may include a toast from the father of the bride who usually thanks everyone for attending and announces the start of the festivities. Some couples even extend this to a response from bride and groom.

The traditional response was a simple thanks to the toaster or a gracious nod and smile as recipients were not obliged to return a toast, stand or even raise the glass.

Non-traditional rules, however, allow the groom to greet his wife, return thanks to whoever made the first toast, and thank both parents and the bridesmaids.

­ Source weddingbells.com

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