Angela Philipps, Gleaner Writer
By the time this article is published, my birthday will have passed. However, right now, as I write, it is the anniversary of my birth. I'm not a little girl anymore, so my parents and siblings are not stumbling into my room with numerous wrapped parcels tied up in ribbons, and singing 'Happy Birthday to You' at the top of their lungs!
It's a little sad, because that's what made this day so special. Of course, the occasion would include a party of some sort too. It was such a celebration that no matter how down I might have been about anything ... well, it all just went away.
Now I'm older, and single to boot. I have no one bouncing on my bed, at the break of dawn, congratulating me for reaching the age I am. The only celebratory gatherings that are going to occur today will do so if I arrange it. Don't get me wrong, my friends and family will all call me, but they'll ask me, "So, what are you doing today?" Nothing really. Work and then head home. They'll tell me to have fun, and hang up the phone.
Grown up singleton
You see, for some reason, once you are a singleton grown up, no one wants to interfere or push you into a plan on your birthday. Perhaps they think it's not their place, or that it's a bit presumptive of them to feel that you'd wish to go out for dinner or drinks with them. Due to their disinterest in suggesting something, you believe that they must be busy, so you end up on your own on the one evening that you'd like company. This could lead to getting a bit depressed about not having a boyfriend or girlfriend. If you were romantically involved with someone, then he or she would be taking you out, or at least have planned a small session with your friends.
So, I've probably got all you single lads and lasses sufficiently upset about all future birthdays. Do not despair, because I have some solutions that will bring the excitement back into the song that you'll be happily humming to yourself when no one else is. First, you'll need to cut this column out of the paper, then slip it into a protective plastic sheet and tape it to your fridge door. Leave it there until your next birthday.
Today, I am going to get up and prepare a delicious breakfast for myself. It's not a workday, so I will call friends, tell them that it's my birthday, and suggest that we all go to the beach or on a road trip up the mountains. Either way, I'll pack a couple bottles of wine and some plastic wine 'glasses', ask them to bring beers, and between us we'll gather up provisions for a picnic. If it's raining, then I'll invite them over to my place and enjoy the same 'picnic' there, along with a few games of cards or dominoes. I might even rent a comedic dvd. I am not going to worry about my age, and I am certainly not going to be stressing about being single.
Doing things differently
Next year my birthday will fall on a weekday. I will have to go in to work, and I might not have time to arrange anything similar to what I did this year. Let's assume I'll still be single. This is not going to drag me down. I shall play my favourite music as I dress and drink my coffee, and I'll be smiling. The latter, my friends, is half the battle.
When I arrive at work, I'll cheerfully say good morning to everyone, and I'll announce that it's my birthday. I'll send out emails, asking friends and colleagues to meet at a particular bar after work. Trust me, most people are looking for something to help them unwind after a day at the office. They'll be relieved to have an excuse to go out, and thrilled to be included.
Pleased with myself for not allowing the dark clouds to mar this moment, I'll be singing 'Happy Birthday to Me' for the rest of the day!
Angelaphilippsja@hotmail.com.
Fascinated reader
One of Angela Philipps' fans is simply fascinated by her. He responds to two of her recent columns below:
Dear Angela,
First and foremost, I would like to take the opportunity to thank you, Miss Philipps, for a 'bellyful' of laughter most Sunday mornings. I am a 24-year-old guy who really enjoys the topics. And ahh, I don't think you are a sour singleton but just a strong-minded woman who just watches her steps and has no room for nonsense, like my wonderful girlfriend of four years. I have been wanting to write for such a long time but just couldn't get around to it. Anyway, let's get to the meat of the matter.
There are several articles that I have been wanting to comment on starting with September 28.
Are you a magnet for garbage? (September 28)For me this was a very disturbing article because no human being in his/her right mind should think that he/she attracts 'scum'. I personally feel that these men or women let desperation lead them into an awful position, of taking anything that is uttered by a person who says they are beautiful. These people are blinded by loneliness in a form that only they can express.
Most of them just rush into a relationship without taking the time to know their partners properly.
I also want to add that women, especially, should watch the type of clothes they wear. I know every woman wants to be/look sexy but showing all the goodies to everyone only attracts 'Mr One-night stand'. Also, they should be very cautious of the places they frequent. I'm not saying you can't find your soulmate in a club, but hey, let's be realistic, that's not the most suitable place to meet a mate.
Is it in his genes or his jeans? (September 14)All men decide on their own that, hey, "I wanna be a player or a galist". It has nothing to do with any genes or animal instincts. As a man, I honestly think there are men who are really afraid of commitment, but there is also a big thing in the mix - intimidation. When a stereotype male figure meets a strong, successful female, who he can't have wrapped around his finger, he immediately turns away from her and moves on to a so-called 'sketel' or 'airhead', like most of my companions call them.
To tell you the truth, I honestly think a lot of females allow this type of thing to happen to them regularly, so it's like a norm for men to use a woman and then just brush her aside like nothing. On the other hand, you have the charismatic con man who is able to lure almost any female into his den or the overnight hotels, and so on.
When you asked: why can't they be happy with one woman? I really sat down and wondered and looked back at school days and replayed all those man-to-man talks my friends had over the years. And when you really think about it, men feel as if one woman can't really satisfy all their needs, meaning he has to have one who gives him his freaky sex, one who can cook really well, one who is beautiful beyond his imagination, one who takes care of him, as in buys him stuff, one who is just really intelligent.
I conclude by saying do what you do best and keep the topics rolling like a tyre.
silly4eva@hotmail.com
Angela responds
Thank you so much for your kind email, especially the feedback from the articles themselves.
All the best.
Angela
