I felt like I was being left out, so I cried even more, until my dad picked me up and kissed me on the cheek.

As far as I know there is only one person who has never missed a single edition of 'Roving with Lalah' since I started writing the feature almost two years ago. In fact, he saved a copy of every single article I've ever written. My dad would go around telling everyone he met that his son wrote a feature in The Gleaner and he was more proud of me than anyone has ever been. He passed away recently, so this week I honour him by dedicating his favourite weekly feature to him.

One Monday morning when I was about four years old, I jumped out of bed, expecting to see my mother standing over me, telling me to go get ready for school. But there was something different about this Monday morning.

When I opened my eyes I didn't see anyone. The room was empty and my ears hurt from the silence. Puzzled by this unexpected break in routine, I ran out of my bedroom, into the kitchen and looked from side to side. I couldn't find anyone, so like any self respecting four-year-old, I burst into tears. Not surprising to me, my father came running when he heard me cry out. He was all dressed and my brother and sister were with him. Both of them were wearing their school clothes and I realised that they were aboutto leave for school. I was in the first grade at the time, so normally I would've gone with them. I felt like I was being left out, so I cried even more, until my dad picked me up and kissed me on the cheek.

Trip to the country

A true family man. My dad went everywhere with his three children.

"It's ok, you and I are going to the country today," he said in his calm, reassuring voice. I stopped crying immediately and my mom came and took me from him. "I'm just going to take your brother and sister to school and come back for you," he said, with a wink.

That was the first of many days during my school years that my dad would keep me home from school so that we could spend more time together. In those days, I was just happy to be out of school, but now that I look back at the time I spent with my father, I realise how precious those days really were. We didn't do much on those days. Maybe we'd drive to the country or go get ice cream, but no matter how simple those days were, they helped create some of the happiest memories I have of spending time with my father.

I realised early that the effort and care that my dad put into raising his three children wasn't exactly customary. I remember when I was quite young, telling my friends at school about playing cricket and football with my dad and of him packing my lunch box every morning before he took me to school. I told them how he quit his job as a well paid executive so that he could spend more time with his wife and children. I was often met with surprised looks and at least a couple friends accused me of making up stories. But that was my father. It was hard for me to go an entire day at school without mentioning him, because he was so involved in my life and the lives of my brother and sister. He would prepare our lunches, take us to school and then pick us up in the evenings. Because of that, all my friends knew him and I was always proud of talking about him.

When he picked us up from school, we would go straight to my mom's office to pick her up from work. It was a routine that formed a big part of my life for many years and I can clearly remember my father telling me that it was important for all of us to go home together so that we could all have dinner at the same time. And so we did. For years, he would insist that we all sit together every evening to have dinner. I wish he was here for me to thank him for that now.

A role model

Always together. I can hardly remember ever seeing one without the other. My father and mother showed me what true love is like. - Photos by Robert Lalah

Because of the admiration that I felt for my father since I was very young, I grew up watching him very closely and tried my best to do everything exactly the way he did. He loved writing, so I started writing. He loved reading so I started reading everything I could find. He loved sports, so I started watching games with him. Everything he did, I wanted to do and I think he knew that all three of his children were watching him very closely. This was a huge responsibility and one that might have felt like a major burden for a lesser man. But believe me, my dad didn't falter once.

We watched him and the care and compassion he showed to my mother and we learned what a marriage should be and how a real man treats the woman he loves. We watched him cook her meals, rub her feet, paint her toenails, hug her when she was sad and care for her when she was sick. We watched him kiss her every morning when he took her to work and we watched him rearrange his schedule just so he would have time to pick her up from work. All of this without a single complaint. My parents were married for more than thirty years, but my dad was so in love with my mother that whenever he talked about her, his face would light up like a teenager in love.

He was proud of his wife and his three children and would bring them up in almost every conversation he had. He carried our pictures with him in his wallet and was quick to pull them out in front of complete strangers if he felt that the occasion warranted such.

Best friend

My dad always insisted that we spend as much time together as possible. (clockwise) My sister Sherene, brother Kevin, my mother Evelyn and my dad Errol enjoying a hearty game of dominos.

By the time I was old enough to understand the concept of friendship, I heard both my sister and brother refer to our dad as their best friend. Of course my mom did the same thing. It didn't take me long to realise why they felt that way and in no time I was going around telling everyone that my father was my best friend. After all, he was the only person each of us knew that we could call on no matter what the problem was, and he would find a way to solve it. No matter what we did, he would not judge us and no matter how stupid we acted, he would never stop loving us.

It was a blessing to have loved and lived with him for so many years. My only regret is that I did not have more time with him. Under his guidance I could have learned a lot more. But what he taught me during his life I will never forget and no matter how much time passes or how old I get, a part of me will always be that little boy sitting in the backseat of my father's car, looking up at him and thinking that he was just the greatest man God ever created.

send feedback to robert.lalah@gleanerjm.com