- Contributed
Dr. Creflo Dollar and his wife, Taffi.
Donna-Marie Rowe, Contributor
HERE WE go again!
It's another year's journey and some of us are so glad to see the back of 2002 and happy once again to be making New Year's resolutions.
Having reviewed our lives and seen where we have fallen short in our walk with God and deciding to turn over a new leaf, a new year is as good a time as any for renewal.
Christianity Today notes that setting personal resolutions at the beginning of the new year dates back to the early Babylonians as a means for self-evaluation and renewal. In fact it dates back to more than 4000 years ago and is one of the oldest traditions of the season. The early Babylonian's most popular resolution was to return borrowed farm equipment. But Joan Esherick, writer for Christianity Today in her article entitled 'Resolution Solution', reminds us that New Year's resolutions are only goals in disguise. Our problem is that we often treat resolutions as desires such as, I want to get in shape or promises saying, "I will be a better friend, husband, wife, parent or Christian", whereas goals give us a plan. We ought to know how to get to that position.
Last week, we looked at The Successful Family, a book written by televangelist Dr. Creflo Dollar and his wife Taffi Dollar, which may be used as resource material for building better relationships or for coaching others. Biblical principles form the foundation of its guides to being successful in family life and relationships and the authors reinforce the necessity to be a doer of the Word.
"Human nature tends to look for instant answers and quick fixes," the Dollars say but "when you're not abiding by the principles outlined in God's Word, you'll eventually throw your hands up and say, 'I'm fed up. I can't take it anymore.'"
One of the outstanding chapters in the book entitled The Master Key: 12 Steps to a Better You speaks to the keys of renewal. The steps are not quick fixes as much depends on you. "The steps are designed to assist in reaching your goal of effecting a permanent change in your life. As you renew your mind with the truths of God's Word, you'll see a marked difference in yourself and your relationships with others," the authors assert.
Interestingly, once we are talking about change, the finger points back at us rather than at others around us. The point is made that people who need a change must make the decision to change themselves. The challenge goes out to try something new, because you have decided that enough is enough. Having made the decision, you must turn your will completely over to God by submitting to Him and this is supported by Isaiah 1:19.
THE 12 STEPS THAT THE DOLLARS PRESCRIBE ARE:
1. Make a decision
2. Turn your will completely over to God
3. Possess a strong desire to change
4. Deepen your knowledge base about God
5. Look into the Word as a mirror to change
6. Diligently apply the truths you've learned
7. Guard the entrances to your heart
8. Defend your mind against negative thoughts
9. Be selective of what you expose yourself to
10. Dissociate from the past
11. Be open to correction and remain teachable
12. Depend on God and others for support
In addition to these 12 steps, other helpful reminders throughout the book include keeping your sense of humour and taking time out for families. Seeing the humour in situations help to defeat stress and adversity. The authors caution, "it is important that you don't take things so seriously that you lose your sense of humour."
The Successful Family seeks to be all encompassing. In the section entitled "Marriage Enhancement", 16 chapters show practical examples of submission, discovering the principles of successful communication, how to fight fair, fulfilling needs in marriage, managing finances, as well as dealing with adultery and betrayal, all the topics dealt with, with pragmatism and frankness.
The Dollars also minister to persons who have lost their loved ones through divorce or death in the chapters God bless our broken home and Table for One respectively.
"Unfortunately, many marriages break up because couples lack restraint and the willingness to change," Dr. Dollar says.
"When they encounter a problem or series of problems, their habit is to work it out only until their comfort level is threatened, and then throw in the towel rather than see things through... When you operate under healthy marital restraints, or guidelines, you don't think about separation or divorce," he points out.
But he acknowledges that any marriage will have differences of opinion and tense moments. At times there will be trouble. But you must decide right from the beginning that divorce is not an option.
E-mail Donna-Marie Rowe at dmarowe@yahoo.com.
